Ounced Now with no hands!

Not Overheard: Dirty lolspeak

“My perfect mate would speak lolcat to me in bed”

i cn beez havin oargazims nau? plzkthx
mah peenus lemme sho u it
lolyeah lolyeah lolyeah ehnnnnnn
no! they be takin mah rabbit

Ha.

Laughing Burning Squid Man

I’ve always considered Laughing Squid to be the internets version of Burning Man. Full of weed, alkaline dust and hot air.

But I’m ashamed to say that the past few weeks I’ve been looking forward to new posts on the inflated blog site.

My only guess as to why is because they let me in on neat lil’ events that are happening and I’d probably like to go to.

BUT NEVER BURNING MAN.

(oh and really, this was just a whiny post to test out my twitter updater)

What to do, what to do?

Sniff, by Oz

Cows make great photography subjects, quite unlike cats. Cows move very slowly, so no worries about that blurry cat head shot. They seem very interested in you, unlike our feline friends. They also provide great (and perhaps gross) photographic opportunities in which the cows will lick other cows urine will peeing. Yeah, I’ll spare you that shot.

When I’m not thinking about cow urine, I spend my time trying to figure out whether not my next photographic investment should be on a nice flash, or that dreamy Sigma 10mm lens a friend let me play with last week. I already have 3 lenses in my arsenal, so it would be logical to pick up a flash. I know if I were to go that route, I’d have to spend a good week reading up on all the… ‘flashy stuff’? I know nothing of flash, I can’t even get the built on flash on my D40x to do what I want.

So flash? Or Lens?

Rant: Up Yours Mezzanine

What are you?! A club? A music venue? I’m confused by the bouncer that was cupping my balls to double check that I didn’t bring in a gun or GOD FORBID a camera!

Seriously, drop the act. Your FiDi/Marina cologne makes your ass look fat.

I’ve been to shows here before, I noticed the ‘no cameras’ rule but always thought that was the bands choice. Oh no, lets check again…

You see what I see there? The camera dipshittery rule isn’t because of a band’s penis getting too big, its the Mezzanine’s vagina thats whining.

I’ve been to three shows here. First for The Knife. That was great, I was too busy swooning over the Swede siblings to bother with the pretentious stink that was floating above. Next up, Ghostland Observatory in November of 2007. Okay, again, not so bad, snuck in the camera, got some great shots. Again Ghostland Observatory in April of 2008. I was elbow deep in bouncer gropings and twatilicious bangles and bags. Thats it, you’re done Mezzanine, and no, I won’t be calling you tomorrow.

Eff you. Eff you and your $6 Coronas.

Morbid Curiosity

It just isn’t Richmond without hearing the symphony of sirens 5-6 times per day. Normally, they just pass through, a teaser of some hoodlums wrong doings, I think nothing of it and carry about my day.

But if you’re lucky you’ll get the full 10 minute orchestration, sometimes with encore performances of 5 minutes or longer. Today, I was in the middle of today’s performance, oh the thrill.

Oddly though, I actually had to stop myself and say ‘Oh thats not safe, you shouldn’t go down there and check it out like the curious cat you naturally are’. Damn it. I wanted to see some blood. So I pouted silently while making a mental note to check the news later in the day to see what happened. (I never remember to do that).

Curiosity is a strange thing. It drove me to watch 2 girls 1 cup, (which by the way is down right disappointing), it was responsible for my secret page views of rotten.com. I feel I can stomach anything, nothing is too gross for me. And I like to push my limits.

So that to me is what curiosity is more about, its about pushing myself. But never will I EVER EVER check out bonsai kitty again. ANY.THING.BUT.THAT.

Cold Shows

You know the shows you go to where you’ve never heard of the band but you go anyway? Anyone have a better term for this than ‘cold shows’?

Anywho, whatever I do call it, I always end up having a blast and oddly enough liking the opening act more than the headlining band.

For example:

The Bravery (3/13), opening act: Here Here
The Cribs (4/3), opening act: Ra Ra Riot
Mat Nathanson (11/2), opening act: Ingrid Michelson
Streetlight Manifesto (3/31), opening act: Zox

All those openers I thoroughly enjoyed, the only other cold show I’ve been to was Ghostland Observatory at Cafe du Nord (10/17/06) and they didn’t have an opener (well that I saw) and fell in love with them.

So safe to say, I’m down for any show whether or not I know or know of them.

Rock on!

OzTV: Episode 3

OzTV is back on the air, we resume transmission with Episode 3:

We start off with The Birds dancing to FunkyTown

Next up is a look into the history of LOLcats

We continue with dancing, this time with Cat, Kitty Cat

A great stop motion fight on this channel

Finishing up with a very unusual moose

Thanks for tuning in!

Stimulus Package

*chortle snort*

Tax season is done and over with. Thank goodness. Though I have to admit it wasn’t that crazy this year, as each tax year end passes, we get fewer and fewer clients, which I’m not complaining about in the least, though the ones that hang around are demanding.

But thats not what I’m here to talk about. I’m here to talk about my anxiously awaiting ‘Economic Stimulus Rebate Check’. Due to a slight over look when finalizing my taxes, my checking account information was not submitted to the IRS because I owed Uncle Sam money this year, so this in turn will result in me getting a paper rebate check. And since its a paper check I shouldn’t expect mine any sooner than mid-June.

There are a few points of this stimulus package that I’d like to bring up. My boss kept fretting last night about getting his taxes done before the deadline because he was under the assumption that if you file an extension, you wouldn’t get the rebate check. This is not true. So, the points:

* You will get a rebate check if you file an extension.
* Rebate checks are only sent to those who have at least $3,000 of taxable income.
* The amount you will receive is dependent on whether you have children, and how much you actually made (the amounts are as low as $300 and go as high as $1,200).
* Rebate checks will be automatically deposited into the checking account that you submitted when filing your taxes. If you submitted no checking account information you will receive a paper check.
* Electronic checks go out in May, paper checks in June. The schedule is in even greater detail here.
* I am paraphrasing all this, read over the IRS website for full and detailed information.

Personally I don’t know how I feel about the whole thing. Giving everyone (nearly everyone) just a little extra pocket change (because really that’s it is) isn’t going to fix our economy. I know that really isn’t the goal, its just a ’stimulus’, but still, someones going to have to pay for it in the end. I’ll probably end up using mine to pay off credit cards. Credit cards that I had to get because I was ALREADY in a bind due to the crumbling economy.

SnapShot Sam: Let’s Start a Photography Section

Golden Gate Bridge, Marin Headlands, 2008

Photography has always been a part of my life. My very first camera (before my first camera I’d always steal my parents’ brick of a 33mm) was a 110. I loved the sleek design, the easy load film. It was fool proof. I thought I was the coolest, artsy-est kid there was.

Springdale, Arkansas, 1995ish

A brief history.
So I had the 110, off and on, I didn’t really start focusing on my photography until about high school. I borrowed a friends camera. You remember the Kodak APS, it was some kind of camera like that. Again, I thought I was the coolest kid around, and I took it with me to a Washington DC trip and compromised my trip budget on all the film I was buying. None the less, my pictures turned out great, and others let me know. This was the first time I was publicly commended on my photography and I even submitted some of it for the video slide show. That was a big hit and I believe the launching point in my hobby.

Around 2002 I bought my first digital camera. A 3.2 Sony Cybershot. Again, a brick. But I did what I could with it and what I couldn’t pull of I made up for it in Photoshop.

USS Hornet, Alameda Point, California, 2003

I didn’t get to graduate to the big cameras until June 2007. My new baby, a Nikon D40X. It was love at first site.

New Toy, Oz, 2007

Since then, its been a growing relationship, learning more and more everyday. I’m pretty sure I’m only using about 25% of my cameras true potential. But thats what the interwebs are for.

Whoops

Well done did the upgrade, but all my tags on my older posts (anything before ounced.com, the stuff that was transfered over) have turned into random numbers.

Grah.