Get back at ‘em!
How to piss off other drivers if they ‘done did you wrong’:
Situation 1 - You’re in front.
1. Wash your windshield. Pull back your little lever (or whatever it is you have to do to get your windshield washer fluid going) and then peak in your rear-view mirror. Trust me, they’ll get the idea. It only really works if you’re going pretty fast. Cruising at 25 MPH isn’t going to give the asshole their just-desserts. Besides what the hell are you doing driving 25MPH? I hope you’re in a parking garage and not wondering around grandma’s retirement complex.
2. Let off the gas. Just slow down. If they ram you, so be it, it their fault and hopefully you’re smart enough by now that you memorized their license plate number.
3. Tap repeatedly on your brakes. Don’t necessarily slow down, but just give them a light show, hopefully they’ll zoom around and give you the bird whilst doing so. That is mos’ def’ a job well done.
Situation 2 - You’re behind them.
1. Shine your brights. Only really works at night, but eh, its subtle and a works sometimes.
2. Put your cellphone to your ear, lean forward and act like you’re trying to read their license plate number. Squint, make a real effort of it, kinda point at it, nod a little, you’re trying to fake out the driver in front of you that you’re on your cell phone calling them in. Into where? Well to you it doesn’t really matter, but trust me you don’t want to look in your rear-view mirror seeing someone squinting trying to read your plate numbers, I know that’d make me immediately nervous. So then ‘hang up’ the phone and hopefully they’ll zoom off.
3. Swerve. ‘Nuf said.
4. Get horny. If all else fails, lay on that sucker. (Your horn that is)
iminurtraffic does not guarantee results. Nor are we liable for what damage may or may not occur. We are also not responsible for any tires being shot at while in the process of trying to piss off other drivers.
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